Man baffled by pregnant colleague's response to 'friendly' question

In their weekly team meeting, a woman announced she was pregnant and now one man is anxious he's created an unpleasant relationship with her after asking a question she deemed 'too personal'

A man has been left scratching his head after asking his colleague what he perceived to be a “friendly” question, only to leave her raging.

Keeping workplace dynamics copacetic can be a concern for many, as the vast majority of people want to ensure smooth sailing and drama-free environments. But one 24-year-old man is anxious he’s created an unpleasant relationship with his colleague after asking her about her pregnancy.

Taking to Reddit to seek reassurance, he said his colleague announced in their weekly team meeting that she’s pregnant and will be going on maternity leave in April. He explained: “Everyone reacted with congratulations and excitement for her, and I did too. We all told her we're very happy for her and her family and wish her all the best.”

The problem arose a few minutes later when he, three of his other teammates and the pregnant woman got in the lift to head back to their desks after the meeting. He continued: “Just for the sake of conversation, I asked her if she is having a boy or a girl. Her face kind of fell and she grimly and shortly said ‘boy’. I thought it was strange that she reacted like this, but let it go.

“Then after I was back at my desk, she came up to me and said that my question was inappropriate, that she was planning on announcing the gender herself but I ‘forced’ her to say it like that in an elevator, so now half of our team knows and it ‘killed the magic’.”

The man said he was “honestly really confused” but made sure to “apologise profusely”. His colleague then “lectured” him on how he “shouldn't be asking personal questions” before she then walked away.

He was stunned as to how this question could be perceived as “too personal” and added: “I'm a 24-year-old dude and I don't know anything about pregnant women or babies or social customs, I guess. I was just trying to be friendly.”

In the comments section, people shared their thoughts. One person said: “Gender announcements and reveals are only special to the person announcing it and I feel they’ve gotten so out of hand.

“Quite frankly she could have just said, ‘I’ll wait to announce that myself to everyone if you don’t mind’ but she decided to be petty AF about it and her being pregnant and ‘hormones’ isn’t an excuse to deflect bad behaviour onto you, someone who was being kind asking questions. Don’t bother getting her a gift”.

AITA for asking my pregnant colleague if she is having a boy or a girl?
byu/Ill_Engineer_6668 inAmItheAsshole

Another person asked: “Why couldn’t the co-worker just say ‘we’re not sharing that yet’?” A third penned: “I was gonna say she is weird AF about it. She could have politely said ‘I’m leaving it a surprise!’ And be done with it. She didn't HAVE to answer with the gender lol”.

Someone else commented: “That’s a perfectly appropriate question and she needs to get over herself. It‘s not like you ruined a family surprise. She could’ve answered more gracefully, along the lines of ‘We’re actually keeping it a secret for everyone, but I’m excited to tell you at the reveal!’ She made it awkward all by herself”.