This week in PC games: the "final" Molyneux game, ski resort management, Game Boy horror and a glamcore heist sim

What we're feeding the Maw

Happy this week, all! I return from my holiday in the mountains with spirit restored, skin bronzed, and knees destroyed and reforged into coiled springs of purest Adventure. Such wonders are my knees today! I rejoice in their knobbly tenacity and tensile splendour. I go out into the street in my pants and laugh, laugh at all the pathetic urban weaklings with quadriceps like overboiled spaghetti that could not bestir a butterfly's wing. I line up this week's new PC games and shoe them into the Maw like sparkling meteors.

Monday 20th April

• Out this day in early access, Space Drilling Station is a vertical outpost builder I find strangely cosy, and not just because your cutaway dollhouse rig is right in the middle of a magma pool.
• TownsFolk is a hexagonal survival strategy game about rebuilding a home in the wilds. There's a choice of turn-based or real-time play.

Tuesday 21st April

• The Third Shift is a Game Boy-style horror game in which you are a museum guard, patrolling such exhibits as the Human Body and Terrors of the Deep. I do not remember playing any horror games on an actual Game Boy. Did you?
• The old world is dying, and the new struggles to be born: now is the time of licensed genre crossovers. Vampire Crawlers is (deep breath) a turn-based first-person dungeon deckbuilder roguelite with characters and weaponry from Vampire Survivors.
• Legendary Pilots is a flight sim with a sepia pixelart finish that approximately hails from the golden age of passenger aviation. Seriously, where are my Pan Am nerds.

Wednesday 22nd April

• Tides of Tomorrow is "plasticpunk" Waterworld with zero Kevin Costners and some novel online functionality that sees you "story-linking" to other players. Their choices shape events in your post-apocalyptic world, and you can witness the ghosts of their decisions.
• Masters of Albion is the new early access god sim from a bunch of former Lionhead and Bullfrog developers, amongst them Peter Molyneux, who says it's his final project. I have genuinely run out of emotions for Peter Molyneux. I gaze upon Masters of Albion with frigid tranquillity.
• While we're reminiscing about 90s game development, Factory 95 is a factory game set inside a Windows OS from an era when Windows wasn't quite as eager to devour your soul. It has its own version of Clippy. Ah, dear, sweet Clippy – may flights of angels sing you to your rest.

Thursday 23rd April

• Titanium Court is "a surreal strategy game for clowns and criminals." But doctor! I AM Titanium Court.
• Offering App is a violent introspective sojourn and minigame package with lots of frightful hand-drawn art.
• Rollick N Roll is a collection of near-edibly pleasant 3D marble runs, where you push buttons on the toy to make little trains move around.
• Above the Snow is possibly the first alpine ski resort management game I've laid eyes on. You get to design your own hiking trails! Argh, my knees are cramping up in agonised recollection.

Friday 24th April

• In Snap & Grab (pictured), you're a burglar masquerading as a glamorous fashion photographer. Take pictures of posh places to create an action plan for your heist team. Kind of like a no-kills Hitman playthrough, but Agent 47 wishes he had this hair.

Things being done by the RPS team this week include: hands-on impressions of [EMBARGOED]; hot chat about Pragmata; much ado about god sims; probably some piracy, because everything's a pirate game nowadays. Needless to say, the other editors are awash with knee-envy. Don't worry, everybody – give it a few days at my desk and my hamstrings will once again have the consistency of antique liquorice.