Spencer Matthews terrified of 'losing' Vogue Williams after spotting worrying sign

Spencer Matthews on his fears of losing Vogue, his determination to make his kids work hard and how he turned his life around

He went to the same school as Prince William, his family home is a 10,000-acre estate in the Scottish Highlands and his daddy is a multi-millionaire – but Spencer Matthews is determined his own children will work hard for the luxuries in life. The father-of-three, 36, has spent the last five years transforming his image from reality TV playboy to sober businessman and endurance athlete, and the hard yards have convinced him not to afford his children a life of privilege – or a trust fund.

“Suffer is too strong a word, but it’s very important that my kids have to challenge themselves and experience things on their own,” says Spencer, who was educated at Eton where fees are currently £63,000 a year. “There’s no point in doing well in life and then giving it all to your kids. It’s doing them a huge disservice.”

Spencer married model Vogue Williams, 39, in June 2018 in a high society wedding at the family’s Glen Affric Estate in Cannich surrounded by close friends and family, before following it up with a star-studded second ceremony in London that was filmed for E4. At the time of their first wedding, Vogue was seven months pregnant with their son Theodore, six, who arrived in September 2018. Theodore was followed by Gigi, four, and Otto who turns three in April.

In fact, Spencer is already ensuring his children are challenging themselves and Theodore has recently joined his local Parkrun, perhaps inspired by Spencer’s world record for running 30 marathons in 30 days on sand last summer. “Theodore is starting to run now,” says Spencer. “He ran two kilometres the other day with an average pace of 5 minutes 20 seconds per kilometre. I was just so proud of him because the kid got around two laps, and some kids give up after one lap because they’re given that option. And he pushed through it to do two laps. The more comfort you wrap around people in general, the weaker they will become.”

Comedian Jimmy Carr is not best known for his wisdom but he’s certainly inspired Spencer’s vision of fatherhood. “Jimmy quite eloquently talks about trust fund kids who are given everything, and he sees them as just being really unfortunate, actually,” says Spencer. “And I would completely agree.”

Competing his consecutive marathons in the Jordanian desert raised £630,000 for Global’s Make Some Noise charity and left Spencer with a fresh perspective. Today he’s more interested in the satisfaction of a job well done than the life of hedonism he once enjoyed as a young reality TV star. It’s this sense of achievement he intends to foster in his own children. “It’s important to not always stay comfortable,” explains Spencer. “People feel like comfort is the goal but comfort certainly isn’t the goal. It’s nice to feel comfortable, but the more comfortable you are, the less you’re going to grow, the less you’re going to learn.

“If you’re a young man who’s just given everything, or a young woman, who’s just given everything, you may not ever understand the need to work because you have what you think you want, and then, therefore, you won’t ever feel proud of yourself. You won’t ever have a sense of achievement.” Spencer overhauled his lifestyle over five years ago when he realised he needed to stop partying and focus on work and family. It was a momentous decision but one that he suspects has saved his life, and his marriage. “I was certainly a danger to myself at one point,” says Spencer. “If I hadn’t changed my relationship with alcohol, the end result could have been pretty troublesome.”

It was his wife Vogue who inspired him to quit his wild ways. While Spencer insists there was no ultimatum, he felt close to losing his soulmate. “Vogue was a massive factor in my wanting to change,” says Spencer. “I wanted to be better for her, initially. I thought I would lose her. There was never any pressure from her per se, I could just see disappointment in her eyes. I care enormously about my relationship, my love for her. I wanted to make her proud initially so that was a driving factor. She’s an incredible mother and a beautiful wife and I feel very lucky to be married to her.”

To prove he’s no stranger to hard work, Spencer just spent a whole day behind the wheel of a Mercedes-Benz Sprinter van to see if he could keep up with the punishing schedule of a delivery driver in a world where everything is ordered online. “I’m full of confidence and I think I can do most things but the level of focus required to be a good delivery driver is much tougher than it looks,” he admits.

Spencer’s transformation is interesting to unpick. He’s a man with many gifts but he has worked hard to find the light. For anyone who wants to overhaul their life, Spencer wants them to know that it will take time and consistency. “Proper change happens gradually, it’s consistently doing things better than before,” says Spencer. “Taking physical fitness and your mental fitness as an example, if you consistently go to the gym and you consistently get fresh air and you consistently eat better and you consistently sleep better, you are going to find those changes are having a positive impact over time.

“But if you go on one run and you have one good meal and then you go back to your usual antics, change is going to be less prominent. It is very much the passage of time that is important. Good, long-lasting change takes time. Overnight change is something that doesn’t really exist.” It’s not just work and fitness Spencer is focusing on. He’s also paying attention to his marriage and making sure that despite their busy careers, and the demands of parenthood, he and Vogue are there for each other.

“I’m really dialed into my relationship,” says Spencer. “Vogue is incredibly busy and so am I but we often make time to prioritise each other. I feel very fortunate to have a wife like her. I admire her and love her in equal measure. There is a lot of respect in the marriage and the relationship which helps.” Our interview with Spencer takes place as he’s preparing to whisk Vogue and their children away for a skiing holiday. Becoming a husband and father has grown Spencer’s world view and, he hopes, made him a better man with more empathy.

“Being a father has changed me a lot,” says Spencer. “Maybe I’m still the main character in my life but I have other people around me to be prioritised. I was pretty selfish for a while when I was a bit younger. My wife is sitting next to me and she probably still thinks I am, but it’s slightly less so now.

“Just growing up generally and doing positive things regularly, gradually makes you change. I love having kids. It has been the best thing that’s ever happened to me for sure.” Last year Spencer shot an advertising campaign with his pal Mark Wright for Marks & Spencer. The shoot deepened their friendship and now Spencer is overjoyed that Mark is about to become a dad with his wife Michelle Keegan. “He’ll be a fantastic dad,” says Spencer. “It’s such great news after all these years that they’ve decided to have kids. I think it’s wonderful for him. I’m looking forward to seeing him grow into the awesome father I know he will be. It’ll be a beautiful time in his life.”

Spencer has partnered with Mercedes-Benz Vans to celebrate the 30th anniversary of the Sprinter, their most enduring
and reliable van on the market, which has kept businesses moving for three decades.

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